The Circle of Love

For the past two days I have been home with the flu.  So, since I'm not treasure hunting in second-hand stores for the lamps I need for our bedroom, or Christmas shopping at the mall, I have been spending some of my spare time listening to my thoughts.

This morning I reflected on a question Kody asked me last night. He had stopped by to unload our new stove from his truck.  Later, while enjoying a "Dad's Burrito" he asked, "Why do you still worry about us kids, Mom?  You should be enjoying yourself, these are your golden years."  I chuckled nervously and he kept looking at me like he was waiting for an answer.  I didn't have one then but today, after giving it some thought, I think I do.

Because I'm your mom.

A Giraffe in the Barnyard

Several days ago my niece, Abbey, and I spent the afternoon watching my two-year-old granddaughter, Sharlet, play with a toy barn and miniature farm animals.   Abbey commented that there was a giraffe in the barnyard.  We both chuckled and I thought out loud that Sharlet probably didn't realize that the giraffe, belonging to a circus-train toy, didn't belong there.  "It's adopted," I said.  "I'm adopted," Abbey quickly responded and I instantly felt shame having connected adoption with not appearing to belong.  I stumbled through an apology and she said I hadn't offended her. We changed the subject of conversation and that was that.  However, I have been asking myself some pretty deep questions since that day.  I will soon become a grandmother through adoption and I desire a heart-felt understanding of it.

Where does the longing to belong come from?  What makes the sensing of it happen or not?  Must we look alike or be from the same race or background to possess the feeling that we belong?

Maybe the longing is from God and only He can truly make us sense it.  I was adopted many years ago into God's family through His grace and His gift of faith in Jesus Christ.  I look like Him when I surrender my heart, humble my spirit, and replace the passion of my soul to belong to the masses of this world with a passion to look and feel like a giraffe in the barnyard as I journey through it.